Music Chit Chat 1

Yesterday was the first in what I hope will be a series of Seminars entitled Music Chit Chat.

Basically my idea is that young aspirants should not have to reinvent the wheel every time. In my musical journey, I have made some mistakes and I have done some good things, and eitherways I think younger artists can benefit from my (and others') experience.

The topic chosen was "Managing my Music Career - steps to becoming a successful concert musician". Had not really done much publicity, except for putting the announcement in Abhivyakti, and a few pamphlets.

So I was pleasantly surprised to see an audience of about 75 people- mainly youngsters, for a change!

The session went on for about an hour and a half, and we covered a variety of topics. There were some interesting questions in the end. But almost everyone came up to me and said they found the session very useful, which makes me feel that I want to continue this...It is very fulfilling to help others, and if my journey can serve to inspire and educate another person, so be it!

Am trying to upload a soft copy of the presentation for those who could not make it. Still need to figure out how....???

Next session is on Nov. 18th (Wednesday) at Ananya, Malleswaram. Topic will be "how to use my practice time effectively", and maybe one other subject.

TED Fellowship

I've been selected for a TEDIndia fellowship. Along with about 100 other Fellows, I get to attend the TEDIndia conference that is being held in Mysore from Nov 3rd - 8th. The conferences feature talks by thinkers and innovators, and are supposed to be extremely stimulating.

Sify is profiling all the Fellows. Check out my profile:

http://sify.com/news/fullstory.php?a=jkpq8khaiac&title=Despite_all_the_chaos_India_is_home_Manasi_Prasad

Concert review

Here's a review of my concert in the Hindu at Chandra Layout last Sunday!

http://www.hindu.com/fr/2009/10/09/stories/2009100950800300.htm

Bismillah Khan Yuva Puraskar

Here's a photo of the ceremony!

And review of my concert:

http://www.hindu.com/fr/2009/09/18/stories/2009091850310200.htm

More later.

My battle with addiction

I have always believed that art becomes truly great when somewhere you can connect to it. When it stops being someone else's story and becomes your own. Which is why I would rather sing about human emotions than on the various attributes of one of the Navagrahas (of course Dixitar krithis are absolutely wonderful- dont get me wrong).

The Mahabharata is one such great piece of art where each one of us can find something to identify with. Recently, I worked with a dancer - Chitra Chandrashekar- in presenting the story of Kunti, at a dance festival in Chennai.

The character of Kunti itself is very powerful, with layers and layers beneath the surface. But, by and large, it is the story of a mother, of sacrifice, of being a pawn in the hands of fate. Nothing much there for me to really relate to....

However, in the very end, after the Kurukshetra war, right there on the battlefield, Kunti decides to renounce all material ties - her family, her beloved sons- and live in the forest for the rest of her days. The text was ' Sneha Paasham imam Chhindhi' (rid me of bonds of attachment). Chitra depicted this in a beautiful way - she removed her dancing anklets (bells) on stage and walked off.

I didnt think much of it at the moment, but a few days ago, the memory of this scene came back, and I felt a stirring deep inside. I suddenly realised that for most artists, their art is an addiction, just like drugs, alchohol or smoking. I am into music because I am addicted to the thrill of performing, of applause, of hearing my voice. Till then, I had always been of the opinion that my choice of staying with music and 'not giving in to corporate greed', was a sacrifice. Suddenly I realised it wasn't- in fact, the opposite. For me to be able to say 'Hah! I really dont care about singing' would be the biggest sacrifice. At that moment, I would be in control of the music, rather than music controlling me.

But can I? That calls for a lot of courage. To imagine a life where being a musician does not define me....that's scary! So the next morning, I re read the section in my website called 'My story', where I talk of choices. But maybe it was not a choice I made after all....maybe it was just my inability to break free of the addiction.

Do they have rehab for artists, anybody?

Tirtha Yatra

Looks like my new production may finally have a home! It has been more than a year since I did something new. The last was 'Olave Jeevana Saakshaatkaara', which was a huge success, but since then has not had many shows.....probably because of the radical theme?

This time, I have decided to go more 'mainstream' as it were. 'Tirtha Yatra' will be in my usual sing-walk-talk style, and will be a journey through the different pilgrimage centres in India and the devotional music associated with each. Still need to do lots of research and make sure each form sounds authentic. Each time I do a new production, be it Mira or OJS, it has been like giving birth to a child (how would I know?) - exhausting, emotional, exhilrating and draining. This one will be no different.

And the journey begins!

Rejection

Rejection means humiliation. Especially when it is public. Embarassment is an intense feeling, where you feel you just want to disappear to a place where no one knows you.
And these feelings will be your constant companions if you are in the art / entertainment field. The worst part is that almost all the time, you will come to know of your rejection from a third party- either the one who replaced you, or an innocent bystander. Those who reject you seldom have the guts to say to your face “Sorry, we picked someone else”.

You will go for recordings to other ends of town at weird hours, sing two lines, and be told, “Recording is postponed as studio is booked now, we will let you know the next available date.” Now don’t be naïve and keep practicing the song hoping they will call you- they won’t. Silence also means rejection. When people don’t call you, or pick your calls- they are not busy, they are just avoiding having to tell you the truth. And when that happens, don’t ask “Why? What did I do wrong?” There is seldom an answer.

One way to handle it is to be thick-skinned and say “Hey, they are the big losers. I was a great catch, and they lost me”. The other way is the revenge reaction “Just you wait- one day I’ll be famous and successful, and you will come crawling to my door, and I won’t give you the time of day. Hah!” The other, painful way, is to look inward and admit you weren’t good enough.

But hey, atleast you tried- if you don’t even try, there’s no risk of rejection, but no chance at glory….